Firstly, I want to tell you that I have the most wonderful husband who cares for me in everything he does. He has accepted my colostomy bag without a problem, he just loves me and he shows me every moment how much. This photo was taken before I even started on my diet in June last year, but what I love about it is the way it shows Iain looking at me in such a caring way! Thanks to my sister Jo, who always seems to capture the special moments so beautifully!
On last Sunday, we went out for a nice outing to the Mount Annan Botanical Gardens Cafe. We all needed something to make us feel a bit normal and to go somewhere with a pleasant atmosphere, something to help relieve some of the pressure that all of us had been feeling. I decided to have a lime and lemon tart, which came with ice cream, strawberries and a lovely white chocolate piped decoration. It was delicious and so nicely presented. It's hard to get your head around being able to eat this sort of stuff, after being so focused on my diet, but I want to use that same focus to get through the tough battles. Learning about what I could do with the diet is a great lesson for the rest of my life!
I also ordered a decaf iced coffee to go with it.
Monday was the day we went back to the oncologist to sign the papers for the clinical trial. Once we had gone through all the questions about the trial that we had come up with, I signed on the dotted line, and so did the Dr. Then, it was all on! I saw the lady who checks all the paperwork for the trial and organises all the things that have to be done in order for my participation to be correct. I had to have a blood test, I was booked in to go to St. Vincent's Hospital the next day, to have the port or long line put in, and then on Wednesday I was booked in to start my first chemo session for about 5 hours, and I also had to do an induction course as well.
My mind was spinning, worrying and over thinking everything! It all seemed to be happening way too fast for my liking, not that I could ever get my head around any of it without going through the experience. That was really what confirmed to me that God is in control! He knows me well, and too much waiting would only make me think and worry more, and lose more sleep. That's the way it had to be. I don't think I slept a wink that night. There had been a mix up with my name, and I and the hospital had papers with the wrong Elizabeth Taylor, wrong date of birth and address. The booking had been done without all the usual checks and I was so mind boggled with too much information, that I hadn't noticed till I got home, hours after the clinic closed.
We got up extra early, had breakfast and took the papers back to the clinic to be fixed and faxed to the hospital, and fortunately, the same nurse was there and got it all made right. Then it was a trip into town, a few wrong turns because our GPS didn't know that some roads are closed in peak hour! We were there in plenty of time to have a drink and something more to eat at the cafe. After that nice little breather, we went upstairs and booked in, checking that they had all the right papers faxed to them that morning. There was a lot of waiting, but I was finally called in to talk to the Dr. who was doing the procedure, he explained a bit about it and how long it would take, and then he led me to the theatre where it would take place. I walked in, sat on the table, lay down carefully as my stomach is still tender from my last op. They put lots of fixtures onto the bed to hold my arms comfortably, and to rest the covers they put over me so I couldn't see what was going on. I believe there was a hole in the covers that the Doctor worked through. I was awake through the whole procedure, which was very daunting to think about, but all the staff were so good, they helped me through it. There was a bit of needle pricking and stinging I could feel, and then it was just a lot of pushing and pulling in the boney area near your shoulder. It's near the side of your chest. He left the needle in the port so it could be flushed and then it was covered with a padded bandage and a plastic like dressing so it was completely covered, there was just a little tube and nozzle hanging out. When I went to recovery about an hour later, I was able to walk there. I sat in the recliner chair and was connected up to a drip to feed antibiotics through the line. I was so glad to have that experience over! Another day nearly ticked off. We did walk the dogs around the block when we got home and they loved it as usual!
I slept so well that night. I was surprised at how well I'd slept, it was definitely what I needed! Thank you God!
Chemo day 1, another day I had been dreading! Just get on with it I say.
Well, this day turned out to be not so bad, thank you God!
I had a beautiful nurse who was with me all day, no staff changes in between, so she took us through the induction and explained everything in a way that I could understand, all questions were treated with respect, no query was silly, I didn't seem to have any side effects that were too bad and I was able to eat a sandwich and have a drink. I do realise that this is early days and lots of things change as time goes bye, but I've come home with a chemo bottle attached in a little bag on a belt, it is slowly infusing through my new port, and tomorrow afternoon, I go back to the clinic to have it removed. The needle will be taken out and a smaller dressing will be put over the port again.
I have appointments for the first 3 days of next week, to see the Surgeon who removed the bowel cancer, for a post op checkup, and then the oncologist to see how the first chemo has been going, and then to see the stoma therapist to show me how to order my bags and supplies, and just to see how I'm coping with it all. By then, I should have a bit of an idea what one round of chemo therapy is like. My immunity could be low and I could be feeling very tired.
We'll just have to wait and see. One day at a time!
This photo was taken a couple of days after I came home from Hospital. I had just come home from the hairdressers and had my hair coloured, washed and trimmed. I felt so much better after that experience.
These are my daughters, who have loved me, cryed with me and cared for me so beautifully!
Im always thankful for your comments and feedback
so thank you in advance!
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